Why Black Friday is One of the Biggest Shopping Days of the Year

Is Black Friday the biggest shopping day of the year? Retailers and the media might lead you to believe so but that may not be the case, at least according to one Wall Street Journal blog. Whether it is or isn't, Black Friday is one of the biggest shopping days and by the time you read this it will be just days away.
Yes, Friday November 27th, a.k.a "Black Friday," will be the unofficial start of the Christmas season as throngs of people make their way to malls all around the country trying to get the best deals possible on holiday gifts.

It's not too much of a stretch to say people will act like crazed fans at a football game or soccer match. It's not uncommon to hear of people coming to blows over items, pushing each other out of the way to get to toys, trampling one another and in one very unfortunate case a man actually died as a result of the shopping frenzy. That's right, last year a Wal-Mart employee was trampled to death as shoppers pushed their way into the store. So much for the season of giving and the spirit of joy!

What causes seemingly normal people will do some very abnormal things in hopes of getting the right gift or best deal? Why would someone stand in line for hours waiting for a store to open when they could visit that same store almost any day of the week? And why to people get up hours earlier than they normally would on their day off?

I contend the madness is because of scarcity, the psychological principle that tells us people value things more when they appear to be less available. This almost automatic response can be triggered by time constraints and competition for a limited number of items.

Black Friday taps into scarcity using the time constraint because it's one day a year. Miss it and you might have missed the best deals of the season. But then again, you might not have missed out because sales only seem to better as Christmas approaches and retailers look to unload merchandise. Nonetheless, over the years the lure of Black Friday has increased immensely and retailers have taken advantage of the popularity of Black Friday by opening earlier and earlier each year. This year some stores will open at 12:00 AM, the moment the clock strikes midnight because Thanksgiving will be over and it will officially be Friday.

Competition isn't limited to the playing field or court. No, when it comes to shopping competition is alive and well, fed into by retailers. Here's how the competition part works - no longer is it good enough to just get to a store because if you are not there when the store opens they might run out of the thing you want. Limited availability is different than limited time so while you might have all day Friday to shop, certain items, those marked "While Supplies Last" or "Limited Availability," might be gone by the time you arrive at 5 AM or 6 AM. Can't let that happen now, can we?

I find it truly ridiculous how people respond because little Jimmy probably doesn't remember that great toy you got him three years ago, the one you headed to the mall at 4 AM to buy. And sweet Sally probably can't tell you which American Girl doll you got her when she was eight years old but it's a good thing you stood in line for several hours to pay for it.

Here's another eye opener. People will say, "But I saved $200!" Saving money is great but many of those same people would not drive across town to save $200 on a car because a $200 savings on a $20,000 car by comparison isn't worth the extra time and effort. So they spend four hours negotiating a car deal, could go across town and maybe spend another four hours to save $200, but they don't. Sure, it's an eight hour investment but many of those same people will spend more than 12 hours at the mall just to save $200. It doesn't make much sense when you lay it out like that but then again, people are Predictably Irrational as Dan Ariely wrote about in his book by the same title. By the way, the real value of the car savings would be closer to $260 because of the interest over the life of a 5%, five-year loan.

So where am I going with all of this? I'm not going to tell you not to shop. For some people Black Friday shopping has become as much a holiday tradition as Thanksgiving, getting a Christmas tree and listening to holiday music. I'd only challenge you to consider if it's really worth the hassle - the lost sleep, extra time as the mall, traffic, fighting for a parking space, the disappointment when someone bought the last item you wanted, etc. I could go on and on but you get the point. Just think for a moment, "Would I normally respond this way? Do I want to respond this way?" Then decide what you want to do next.

If you know you're going to give into the madness then I'll try to save you a little bit of time by giving you the Black Friday web site so you can get a sneak peak at some of the deals that will be out there. Before all the craziness starts I'll end with this - I hope you have a very Happy Thanksgiving and a safe time no matter what you decide to do.

Brian
Helping You Learn to Hear "Yes!"

Influence At Work

By now some of you have noticed I've been posting twice a week. I'm going to make an attempt to have a short Thursday morning post each week to let you know about other resources that might interest you.

Some people might wonder why I'd promote someone else's work, especially if it's in the same field as mine. I've come to learn in the online world the principle of reciprocity is king. You help others, promote them, and they usually do the same for you. The online pie is plenty large enough that no one has to worry about getting their fair share.

This week I want to point you to Dr. Robert Cialdini and his organization, Influence At Work. Many of you reading this know he's the reason I became so intrigued with influence and ultimately started this blog. If you want to read more about my association with him click here.

Dr. Cialdini and several of his associates have a blog called Inside Influence Report. I'm not a doctor, and I don't play one on t.v., but these guys are doctors - in the field of social psychology - so they're worth listening to when it comes to mastering influence and persuasion. They do the social science research, dissect other scientist's research and break it all down so you can use the information to be more a more persuasive person. I highly recommend you check out Inside Influence Report for great insights on influence and persuasion.

Brian
Helping You Learn to Hear "Yes!"

A Rose by Any Other Name

Probably one of the most famous lines ever penned was from Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” The saying conveys this – what really matters is what something is, not what we call it. It’s true that a rose would smell no different had we called it anything else.

But, names do matter, even if they don’t change the thing being described, because they change us and how we think and respond. Here’s a nice example; Chilean Sea Bass, a popular dish, wasn’t such a hot seller when it was referred to by its real name, the Patagonian Toothfish. That name’s not too appealing and fish eaters didn’t think so either. Ah, but sales took a turn for the better when it was renamed because Chilean Sea Bass sounds interesting and exotic.

Let’s focus on Dale Carnegie now because he said, “The sweetest sound to anyone is the sound of their own name.” We’ve all met people who wish they’d have been given a different name. Johnny Cash made that notion famous when he sang about A Boy Named Sue. However, despite complaining, most people who wish they had a different name will never change their name.

Making it a point to use someone’s name can help you win friends and influence people for lots of reasons.

Most people get a sense of importance when their name is used. This makes me think about my college days when I worked as a valet a Muirfield Village Golf Club, the place where Jack Nicklaus hosts The Memorial Tournament each year. One summer a car pulled up and as I opened the door one of Jack’s very close friends, a founding member of the golf course, got out of the car and what he did next I’ll never forget – he simply said, “Thanks, Brian.”

As I type this I still remember how this important man, Jack Nicklaus’ friend, using my name made me gasp a little. I couldn’t believe he knew who I was. Then I noticed my name badge, the one worn by all valets. But that didn’t change the reality of how I felt and that I still remember it 25 years later!

If you want to make someone feel important, maybe even make their day, try using their name. Give it a shot next time you’re checking out at the grocery store or use your server’s name when you eat out next time. I bet you’ll also get better service in both instances.

Using another person’s name also creates sense of relationship. Once when I was traveling I stopped in a TGI Friday’s for dinner. The server behind the bar came over, said, “Hi, I’m Ron. What’s your name?” Then he stuck out his hand to shake mine. As we shook I told him my name and he replied, “Brian, I’ll be your server tonight. If you need anything just let me know.”

Each time Ron came by to check on me it was, “How is everything, Brian?” or, “Can I get you another beer Brian?” Whenever he addressed me it was by name. So there I was in a different city, sitting in a restaurant where I didn’t know anyone but I felt like Ron and I were friends. I have to believe he enjoyed his job a little more because he felt like he was waiting on friends. And I’m sure he got much better tips too because he engaged Liking.

One more reason to use people’s name is simply this; it gets their attention. Imagine you’re at a crowded event where there’s lots of background noise and talk going on. You’re not paying any particular attention until you hear your name. It’s amazing how good your listening becomes at that point as you try to figure out if it’s you someone is talking about.

This applies to email too. Several years ago I sent an email to about 300 people who’d been through some training I’d conducted. In the email I asked for some success stories but got none! I didn’t hang my head and think the training was ineffective because I knew it was good stuff. I concluded the culprit was a psychological phenomenon known as “diffusion of responsibility.” Because my email wasn’t addressed to anyone in particular, everyone thought someone else would respond and ultimately no one did.

So after about a week of no replies I changed my method. The next communication was a “personalized” email. Using the Microsoft mail merge feature I simply included people’s first names from my training database. Rather than print letters I merged into an email so 300 separate emails went out in the span of about two minutes. Each person’s name was at the top and I asked a question about the training. The result – within a week I had 125 replies and got dozens of great success stories! Taking away the impersonal nature and including a question was all it took.

So to quote Dale Carnegie, “Remember their name,” because this engages Liking and builds relationships.

Have you found it to be the case that you feel and act differently when people use your name? Have you seen people respond differently to you when you use their name? If you answered “yes” to yourself on either of those leave a comment below so we can learn more.

Brian
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes!”

Listen to Influence Tips on CinchCast

A Facebook friend, Ardy Skinner, author of The Lavish Cheapskate, turned me on to a very cool tool I want to share with all of you. CinchCast is a website that allows you to record messages from your phone and share them with others over the Internet. Ardy broadcasts 1-2 minute tips to help you find ways to stretch your dollar and live "lavishly" while spending like a "cheapskate." To listen to some of Ardy's helpful advice click here.

Knowing some people learn best through listening, I decided to add CinchCast as a new way to share influence tips with folks. On my site, www.CinchCast.com/BrianAhearn, I now broadcast a 2-3 minute "Influence Tip of the Day" every Monday through Friday. Take a moment to visit my page to see and hear what I'm talking about. As I record tips I categorize them according the six principles of influence and add a written comment concerning each tip so you can easily find what you want to learn about most.

If you like what you hear and listening is your preferred learning method then sign up as a follower on CinchCast and you'll get an email reminder whenever I post a new tip. I realize not everyone is into following blogs so if you know someone who might enjoy learning through listening, I'd really appreciate it if you'd take a moment pass this along help me spread the word.

Brian
Helping You Learn to Hear "Yes!"