When I speak to groups I like to start with that question. I’ve never had someone say “no” or challenge me on it because people know it’s true. I’m not telling you getting someone to say “Yes”
is always the most important skill nor am I implying you can get away without other essentials. For example, when applying for a job:
- You still need expertise and trustworthiness in most cases to even get a look.
- You’ll need some amount of likability to get hired.
- Depending on the job, there may be pre-requisites like a college degree.
The things I listed are requirements
to even be considered. But when you have all the necessities – the college degree, smarts in your field, likability – and you get your opportunity, will you be able to persuade the person or people you talk with that you’re the right candidate for the position? At that point persuasion becomes your most important skill!
On a personal level, understanding how people think and adjusting your communication accordingly is very handy to get your spouse, significant other or kids to do what you want.
The psychology of persuasion also can help you get a better deal when buying a car or home. It can help you get a store to take back your item even if it’s outside the normal return period.
Last week I told readers the first P in PEOPLE stands for Powerful. This week we’ll explore the first E in PEOPLE, which stands for Everyday.
Persuasion is an everyday skill. I contend that for the vast majority of people who walk this planet there’s
hardly ever a day that goes by where they’re not interacting in some capacity with other human beings. In modern life even if we’re sick in bed we’re making phone calls, checking email, sending texts and working social media. We might not have face-to-face interaction with people but we still interact with them. I’m willing to bet that far more often than you realize, you’re making requests of people because you want them to do something for you.
So whether it’s work (professional) or outside of work (personal) much of your success and happiness depends on getting others to say “Yes” to you. In other words, it’s an everyday skill and I contend the better you get at this skill the more success and happiness you’ll enjoy.
When I teach workshops and do speaking engagements it’s readily apparent to me people like the idea that what they’re learning has potential impact on every relationship they have. It’s not
like teaching folks a new computer system that has no bearing outside of work and might very well change in five years. Human nature rarely changes and when it does it takes a long, long time for that to happen so what I teach audiences will very likely be a skill they can use the rest of their loves. Pretty cool!
It makes my day to hear a
salesperson contact me to tell me how they landed a tough account because of
something I taught them. And I get equally excited when someone else comes back and says their child is doing better because they applied their newfound persuasion skills and got a better response.
In the career section of my personal mission statement I wrote I want to “be remembered for making my workplace better for having been there in both a productive and personal sense.” Teaching the science of influence helps others and allows me to fulfill part of my
purpose in life!
I encourage you to keep reading, learning and applying the psychology of persuasion. It’s a skill you’ll use Everyday and one that you literally have a lifetime to master. Next week we'll dive into the O in PEOPLE which stands for Opportunities.
influencepeople
Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.
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